NEW PRODUCT ANNOUNCEMENT
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
AUSTIN, Texas – October 28, 2004 – Smith Industries LLC today proudly announces the release of their latest product, Child 3.0. Also known as “Truman Michael Smith,� Child 3.0 has been under development for nine months and arrives just in time for the holiday season.
Child 3.0 weighs 8lb. 12oz., measures 20.5 inches in length, and comes equipped with fully functioning lungs, bladder, and bowels. At present, Child 3.0 has limited functionality apart from consumption, evacuation, and noise production, though the partners assure the public that it is fully upgradeable and new features will be added regularly. Those familiar with the company’s first two products, Child 1.0 (codenamed “Simon� and built before company headquarters were relocated to Austin) and Child 2.0 (codenamed “Nathan� and experiencing some compatibility issues with Child 3.0), will recognize many features characteristic of Smith Industries, including ample proportions and pudgy pudgy cheeks.
At a press conference held this morning at North Austin Medical Center, Chief Technology Officer Derrick M. Smith and Chief Operating Officer Julie M. Smith addressed criticisms concerning Child 3.0’s poorly working sleep functionality. They said they fully expect to patch the sleep problem within the next two to three years.
A visual representation of the product is shown below:
[Kaimi’s note: Word from Julie’s husband Derrick is that she is doing fine, and so is the baby. She is just suffering from one ailment — lack of internet access in the hospital. Hopefully that will be cured soon. Congratulations Julie, Derrick, and Smith Children 1.0 through 3.0!]
Congratulations Julie and Derrick! That was a funny and clever announcement.
“She is just suffering from one ailment – lack of internet access in the hospital.”
I figured they’d have wireless in Austin. I mean, it’s a cutting edge metropolis and all, isn’t it?
Many congratulations, and much love, to Julie, Derrick, and their new product. Welcome to the world, Truman!
Congratulations Smiths! That’s one good-looking baby, and good-looking newborns are hard to come by.
I always thought lack of internet access was the cure.
Congrats, Julie!
Coungratulations Julie! Glad you survived! I’ve been following your pregnancy on the WTM boards also, as have many others. You’ll have to post over there soon. He really does look good.
YAY! Congrats to Julie and family!
Congratulations! Welcome 3.0. I hope that the “input rejected” bug is resolved in a couple of months as well.
So are those pink and blue-striped knit caps used everywhere?
Congratulations! And Julie, we expect to see a *lot* more of you around here now, since everybody knows that an office chair in front of the computer is the only comfortable place to nurse. (At least that’s my excuse.)
Congratulations Julie. You got yourselves a good-looking boy there.
Congratulations Julie and Fam.
Following up on William Morris’s comment…That is the same cap, same blanket, and may be even the same baby is in my children’s new baby photos. Come to think of it…it is the same child as every baby photo that I have seen recently. Who is this child? How does he/she do it?
Congrats!! Cute child!!!!
Yeah!
Congrats…maybe there’s an Austin T&S get-together to be had when you’re up and at it again.